Words
words come to me with neither rhyme nor reason like dandelion petals in the wind
i lack the aesthete to weave sense into them
or the polish to bind them to the keys of the grand piano in my brittle bones
and i haven't been able to find the chords lately either
not since you left, not since the autumn winds blew my hair askew and the snow flakes melted in my porcelain palms
now its just strings of words that wont form poetry
nor prose nor the ethereal rhythm your fingers strummed on your grandfather's guitar
or the relentless thundering of rain on tin roofs
and i keep trying to immute other writers in my poems for mine alone wont make sense, and i keep being a wannabe product of the times i keep trying to fit every emotion in one poem and one in none for nothing makes sense anymore
it is just endless lists of letters and phrases and words,
like the the fine lines of pain that blemish my beige tinted skin
a mass of pain and helplessness or the edgy teenager to my therapist
but each a tale of angst to me,
one for my first love,
two for the school bully
three, four, five, six, and a hundred for the betrayal and pain and loneliness
and for the fathomless shame of being me
a boy i liked had vowed to send me letters, with pressed flowers and white roses and i had messed up and almost let myself trust again
and so i keep writing and scratching out the pain in my ink stained fingers, and endless hits on backspace until i can find the rhythm, if ever
and some days i think maybe i should write down all the words that come to me and dip them in freshly ground coffee and dare to love again
Trisha is a 17 year old from Kolkata, India who is currently a highschool junior studying Science. She has been drawn to literature and the pure sciences ever since she was a toddler and she keeps having weird ideas which she occasionally likes to write down. She is your typical nerdy coffee addict and when she is not poring over books, you'll likely find her travelling, exploring her city, trying out new cuisines and pretty much living a literary dystopia.
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